COVID-19 Chronicles: Let's Get Ready

Today I am a 5 out of 10, a 5! Magnificent!

Very proud of my superior gut flora. I did have an uncomfortable 20 hours of noticing my stomach, but I did NOT suffer actual indigestion. Weird flex but give this one to me.

Yay belly, great job, go team!

One reason I have not panicked or cried for myself after nearly two weeks of this… odyssey… is that I trust my body no matter what. It’s not the doctor or the drugs or the machines that heal, IT IS MY BODY that heals! Yours too. No amount of money or materials can do that for you, you do it yourself.

It’s not death we are afraid of - I don’t think - it’s mostly PAIN, uncertainty, loss of control, death of the ego. Logically once we are dead we can’t feel pain or fear any more, right? Like a candle that is snuffed out, the flame is just gone. Does part of us survive physical death, no idea, but I am confident that physical sensations do not.

Am I afraid of pain, sure. My coronavirus experience has not been painful, though. For instance if I had to choose between a day of nausea or a day of gulping air and struggling to breathe, (both of which I have had this week), I’d choose the nausea every time. I find it merely annoying and distracting. No biggie.

In our culture we have this tradition where we are supposed to say “I can’t imagine how you must feel.” I hate this to my bones, it is a wrong thought. Of COURSE you can imagine how I feel, otherwise why would you be reading about it??

You know what nausea feels like

You know what being woozy from the flu feels like

You know what a headache feels like

You know what being dizzy feels like

I’m willing to bet you’ve been out of breath before

You know what it’s like to worry you will die soon

When people think about prepping they always think about the gear. (Will get there I promise). I say it’s way more important to focus on your emotions and mental state, your communications, and organizing your information. This is why my hubby and I got into leadership training. Everybody calm down or someone is going to kick over the kit.

Can you contemplate being very sick in bed for two weeks without freaking out? Yes, I have great faith in you

Can you picture yourself being confused, losing focus, losing your train of thought? Aka typical Monday morning, yes you can

Can you picture yourself in total panic, crying and flailing your hands around? Maybe not, I know {I} can, I know that I am a pitiful coward and that is why I train

Do the visualization exercises and then imagine yourself snapping yourself out of it. Your mental touchstone will be unique to you. Your methods will also be unique to you.

For myself, I use a combination of sweet talk and massive verbal abuse, something I have field-tested. “Come on honey, you can do it, you lazy *****,” quoting to myself from Full Metal Jacket, etc. Babe you got this. Often I just tell myself HEY, hey.

Emotionally I have been feeling massive guilt and shame, blaming myself, waves of sadness, annoyance at myself for having stupid priorities, a lot of philosophical thoughts about letting go and forgiveness (of others, not myself alas), curiosity and sometimes awe, wistfulness about things I will miss from this world… and also noticing how directly my optimism vs. moping are correlated with my physical energy level. I doubt another person would feel my exact combination of emotions, that’s totally understandable!

I redirect to thinking of positives. For me these particular visualizations have helped distract me and give me a sense of purpose. Meaning? No. To me a virus that affects humans is a meaningless accident of fate, just like earthquake or hurricane. Purposes, to keep my husband well, stop frightening my poor parents, see my friends again, inspire others to keep a cool head, generate convalescent plasma! Field promotion from pawn to queen, saving doctors and nurses who will go on to save hundreds of lives.

We can make some sense out of this.

I could not imagine going to the hospital and I did not want to bother any actual medical professionals. I asked, who can teach me? Answer: sick people! They were endlessly kind and patient in sharing their experiences, including someone who got an organ transplant. Section 5 is with their help, mistakes are all mine.

Okay, time for the list. You want to get ready in case this alien trash comes for you or your family.

1. Write down all your pertinent info in BIG PRINT and have each person take pictures of everyone’s stuff in your respective phones.
   1. Each family member’s name and age
   2. Doctor’s names and office numbers
   3. Insurance plan details, i.e. Kaiser card #
   4. List of prescriptions
   5. Allergies to any medications, antibiotics, etc.
   6. Do you have any health conditions, what are they?
   7. Emergency contact name & numbers, this person should run interference for you & be single point of contact between your tribe & hospital personnel
2. Living will & advance care directive
   1. These are different by state, no idea outside of US
   2. Can download simple form, sign it, have a witness. It basically just asks whether you are an organ donor and whether you want to be resuscitated or not, names who can make decisions for you, important if you know your family will disagree
   3. Mine came with a little wallet card that I keep behind my drivers license along with my whole body donor info (800#)
3. PLAN TO STAY HOME IF YOU CAN!!!
   1. What good would the test do you, it’s just a snapshot in time anyway
   2. Viral load heavier in hospital with other sick people
   3. Getting transported is stressful
   4. You have a 95% chance of riding this thing out safely at home
4. Meds, what will you need?
   1. I’m not a doctor and I don’t know you, please be skeptical about this list
   2. I have been taking 1 Mucinex DM and 2 Costco acetaminophen, morning & night, seems to have prevented cough, fever, and body aches in my case
   3. Also 2x of Priority One Super Bio Vegetarian, total 4/day, secret weapon!
   4. If you start having trouble breathing you can probably get a prescription or inhaler mailed to you direct from pharmacy, or have a friend pick it up & drop it off within hours
   5. Call your doctor or specialist first, will probably get much faster response
   6. (Note: in 2004 I had a respiratory infection, coughed up blood, measured 52% lung capacity. *That* was not *this* but I did not need to go to hospital, simple inhaler turned it right around, several years later I ran a marathon!) Don’t be scared.
5. Hospital go bag, what goes in it?
   1. Use a bag that you can wipe down & disinfect, or throw away
   2. Wallet with ID & health card, your page of medical info
   3. Meds, glasses, medical devices
   4. Phone & charger, small extension cord can be helpful, expect no phone reception
   5. Notepad & pencil in case you need to write notes to staff
   6. Earplugs & face mask
   7. Apparently you can bring your own pillow?? & small blanket??
   8. Deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, floss, baby wipes, hair tie
   9. A few changes of underwear, you might be able to change your shirt or wear pants in bed
   10. Take out your jewelry especially earrings, can’t wear in scanner, might get lost
   11. Entertainment: headphones, books, crosswords, download some movies etc
   12. Snacks?! Energy bars, tea bags
6. Get ready at home, almost there!
   1. Figure out where each person would be lounging all day
   2. Can all be on one floor, no stairs?
   3. Need a flat surface next to each spot, tape charger cord so it is easy to reach
   4. Clear path from each area to bathroom, be safe!
   5. If you have a bucket, drag it out, inch of water in bottom with capful of Pinesol or soap, or gallon freezer bags would probably work for, ah, nausea
   6. Start making food, individual servings you can microwave or eat cold
   7. Heavy blanket for each person for chills
   8. Stack of t-shirts & maybe wash cloths for each person for fever
   9. Everything you think you will use while ill must be EASY TO REACH
7. If you have pets:
   1. Measure out food for each in individual servings, label with Sharpie in case friends have to come pick them up
   2. Write list of instructions for food/meds
   3. Picture of each pet with name if they have different needs
   4. “Pet bag” with leashes, harnesses, extra bowls, styptic gel, meds if any, comb, toys, poop bags
   5. Stack of carriers labeled with names
      
   6. Contact info for rescue if you have exotics
8. Practice and rehearse!
   1. Go over your plan several times in your own head
   2. Talk over your wishes with your partner, most people vapor lock and do not want to choose options on advance care directive i.e., bury or cremate? Tell them they only have to do this once and then pretend you never had this conversation
   3. If you are a caregiver, maybe ask advice on how to explain steps in a way they can understand, “steps” like “hand this paper to the nice EMT”
   4. Talk to your chosen emergency contact and offer to be theirs. It is not okay to have several people calling hospital after one patient, let there be one person who asks and answers, gives status updates.

All your questions really come down to, Can I handle this? Yes, you got this. Be well.